Thursday, April 12, 2007

SHOCKED, HORRIFIED AND FEELING ILL.

The doctor's nurse rang me, said my smear results were rather bad, and I needed a colposcopy and biopsy asap. No second smear test for me obviously.... straight into advanced tests.

What is freaking me out is that it took all my nerves to go for the smear test to begin with, and to know what I have to do now is making me feel really sick. My niece had this procedure done a couple of years ago, I went with her.... it wasn't that nice.

Now, my tummy is rumbling around like nobody's business, and it's still sore from TOM... and now I'm thinking... "Is it sore cos of my TOM, or something sinister"? So annoying how one's mind can screw you around. I'm probably gunna get bugger all sleep tonight. Damn. nite nite again.

13 comments:

  1. Shit Chris. Thinking of you.

    (It's no consolation but this has decided it for me. I am calling to book in for a smear tomorrow.)

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  2. Oh darling, how horrible. The not knowing is worse than what the results are gonna be. It's the constant "what if's" that go through the head when one is waiting. You need to try and focus on something else, I know that is so much easier to say than to do. My thoughts are with you and I'm sorry for posting such a boring post!! Kia Kaha

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  3. oh no! thinking of you.
    I am sure that your tummy is just sore due to TOM, but i think if i was in the same position as you i would be having the same thoughts.
    I hope you get a good night sleep.
    I think the not knowing would be the worse.
    Look after your self and i am thinking of you.

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  4. Anonymous10:31 PM

    The waiting is the worst, and our imaginations are our worst enemy.

    You may not believe in positive thought (but i do) and i'll be sending a shit-load of them your direction.

    You are there for everyone, including all of us. Thanks for letting us be here for you

    xxx

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  5. Hey I know it sounds scary - but I can tell you that I did the same round of tests about 5 years ago - I was apparently showing signs of warty virus - sound gross doesn't it - but seemingly that can be a precursor to cancerous cells. I had the tests and the gyno was a lovely elderly man (retired now) who explained it all to me with great patience and caring. Anyway had to have smear tests at 6 monthly intervals for a couple of years then the virus went away - which quite often happens. I honestly didn't find the opsy's too bad - a little nick but no real pain. I realise that they may be checking you for some other finding but just wanted to try and reassure you that it isn't necessarily going to be that bad - mind you that still won't stop your headspin and worrying - take care - sending you lots of positive vibes Z xx

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  6. Hugs, Hugs and more hugs, my thoughts are with you and will send you some good karma across the Tasman.When do you go for the tests?

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  7. Damn... not good news. I have had this all done years ago now. I had to have an operation too but all has been well now since 1990. Just shows the value of getting regular smears - good luck.

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  8. (((HUGE, HUGE HUGS)))

    I know that none of this is nice or easy but what is a horrible expeience for your neice doesn't necessarily mean it will be the same for you, you may just sail through it better than you think but either way it has got to be sorted so just go to any appointments which of course I know you will.

    Try hard to think positive.

    We are ALLLLL here for you and like you, WE CARE SO MUCH!!!

    (((HUGE HUGS)))

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  9. Oh Chris, I'm so sorry. I know you're scared, I would be too. Thinking of you!

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  10. ARG! Sorry you have to go through this - likely this news is what makes your tummy upset?
    My surgery for this was years ago, but I don't remember it being all so bad... I DO remember one of the drugs they gave me was pretty cool! =)
    Hang in there girl.... you've got quite the cheering section over here!

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  11. ((BIG HUG)) Please take care. Try not to worry too much, keep positive. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  12. Good luck for today : ) Thinking of you and sending pink bubbles of goodness your way.

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  13. Hope you don't have to wait to long for the procedure.... crossing fingers/toes for you.

    Take care Jaxx

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