Saturday, January 18, 2014


A comment came in yesterday from an ANONYMOUS person.  I thought long and hard about what to do with it.
Delete it, unpublished, immediately came to mind, it's what I do most often now with nasty comments.

But Steve said "No, put it in your post and then I can address it".

So that's what I'm doing... but I will have a reply to it as well.

So you're bragging that the other taxpayers in your country have to support your daughter's children? Since you daughter turned out so poorly I would think that you would feel it was your obligation to financially raise your grandchildren ON YOUR OWN without everyone else paying for them. The same goes for your daughter. I'm sick and tired of people who expect complete strangers to pay for their poor parenting. on WEDNESDAY, AND I'M DRAWING A BLANK
on 1/17/14

Firstly:  I was not 'bragging'... I was stating a fact. Pure and simple.

Next point:  Stew and I, and virtually every member of our family have worked and paid taxes for decades, so I don't feel bad about being given financial assistance to raise two children we love, and didn't want to see go into care (which, coincidentally, would have cost THE TAXPAYERS HEAPS MORE).

Before Brylee & Griffin came into our care, our taxes had been paying for the thousands of other people on benefits.

Next Point: How our daughter has 'turned out', is not down to OUR PARENTING.  She has free will, and how she has conducted her life has NOTHING to do with how she was raised.  We have raised 6 kids, and from where I'm sitting, they are all doing well.

Raising two extra kids was never on our agenda.  The fact that we are is testament to our love for them.  A vast majority of people would not, or could not take on two infants after having raised 6 kids already.

What we receive towards their care via the government does in NO WAY cover the financial cost to Stew and I, nor the extra years we have spent raising children we didn't plan on having.

That is the end of my say, now to Steve.... ( god help us all).

Hello, my name is Steve, and I suffer from a chronic illness, my symptoms are extensive,  such as a lack of an oral filter, the ability to be an asshole at the drop of a hat, and the inability to deal with stupid idiots, who decide that they are above others and have the right to tell others that they are not doing a good job in regards to raising their kids/grandkids. Now, let us begin....

First and foremost, my mother was not bragging about anything, simply letting her friends know that she was happy that her government had finally acknowledged the hard work and dedication her and my father Stew give to the grandkids they raise as their own. Considering the amount of money our government throws away at the low life scum that wallow at the bottom of the New Zealand social barrel, hard working, deserving people like my parents deserve a break, and if this comes as a monetary supplement for school fees and the like, then all the better. At least they are not out spending their supplement on pokie machines and booze, like a lot of the beneficiaries in New Zealand.

My second point, and in response to what was by far and away the most ludicrous statement you made, was that the cost to our government was a strain on everyone else. I hope it dawns upon you that the cost to a government is larger to take an abandoned child into care, then seek out a foster family for it, before the child is finally adopted by a willing family (which in some children's case never happens), than it is to pay a small amount of money to have blood relatives take in and raise the children.

What Lacy does (or does not do), has nothing to do with my parents, she is an adult, and as such makes her own decisions and lives by her own means. She is doing well, and is a great mother, and your condescending tone frankly pisses me off. Everyone makes mistakes, but no mistake determines ones life. And before any losers decide to comment upon how my parents may have enabled my sister to live a carefree life, you are so severely wrong, all they did was take in two of their OWN grandkids, so that they might be raised by their own family who love them.

Last but not least comes the killing blow..... at no point in time did my parents expect anyone (let alone the government) to help pay for raising Brylee and Griffin, they did so out of love. And for someone like you (some unknown loser, who hides behind the anonymity of the internet) to intimate that my parents expect "strangers" to pay for poor parenting is absolutely stupid. Not to mention the obvious fact that the level of parenting my folks show on a daily basis is more than most people can show in their entire lives. My parents give everything to their kids, and always put themselves second to others, and its people like you that just remind me how ignorant losers like you really are.

Now let us continue on with our day, free from anonymous losers.............

 I got some lovely photos yesterday of the littlies:

 NO baby was hurt making these photos.

 Coco is very good with the babes.

Seriously, I spent all day trying to work out how to make my space more workable while sewing larger projects.  After HOURS I finally settled on using the BIG table to my left to lay the quilt on to sew it as it gets bigger and heavier.

That meant moving everything off it and finding new places to put it all.  That took bloody ages too.

Stew had suggested I use the dining table upstairs, but I really didn't like that idea.  I was concerned a baby might find a dropped pin or some such.  Better to keep all that in a baby-free area.

Well, it's the weekend and that means grocery shopping time.  Freakin wonderful.  Stew and I will probably go out first thing this morning and get it done.  We are out of so much!  
Bex is on babysitting duty while we do the shopping.  She's finding out how it feels to have TWO babies.  

Grocery shopping done for another fortnight, and for once I didn't leave the supermarket wanting to scream and ram into idiots in the aisles!

CHERYL, UK:  I will post photos and instructions on how I've made/quilted the sashings tomorrow.  

Right now I want me lunch, then a relaxing half an hour before getting on with me quilt!

Who mentioned tracking?  Cos YES... I have the Anon's ISP address, and where they come from.  I shall know if that ANON visits my blog again just by typing in their ISP address. 
And would ya look at that?  ANON visited my blog again this morning at 10.56 am/ NZ time.
HI Anon.... giving you crabby face. 

It's been a lovely afternoon here.  Stew has mown the lawns and now he's cooking dinner!
What a man.  I got a little sewing done, then rang out of the fabric I was using for the sashings on the back of the quilt.  So I've washed another length of blue fabric, and am waiting for it to dry so I can continue.

The back of my quilt is going to look a bit mis-mashed as I've had to use several different fabrics on it.  Not that I care.  Who looks at the back of a quilt anyway?  Well... some 'perfectionist' might, but I'm not fussed.

End of Day:  I've been dancing around my 'bedroom' in happiness!  I got all the Dresden Plate Rows joined tonight.  Sewing Rows 4 & 5 to the first three was not as tortuous as I had anticipated.  It certainly helped that Bex was there helping keep the weight of the quilt off the sewing machine needle.  
I was scared I was going to break yet another one, having broken 2 already!
nite nite


  1. Well said both of you guys. I hope it doesn't drag on and on in the comments. Carry on the excellent work of raising such a great family.

  2. I have not been on your blog (or anybody else's for that matter) in a long while (had some family stuff of my own going on and haven't even had the chance to keep my own blog going), but I still try to take the time to read when I get the chance. I think you and Steve replied perfectly. Sadly, there are others who take it upon themselves to judge. You have a beautiful family and it shows. My opinion is that if you pay into something, it is there (like insurance) if you ever do need it. Where I live (Canada) we all pay into it and yes, I too have had to have assistance at one time. Don't let them ruin your day. Great pics!! xo

  3. Oh wow for that one person to have the nerve to even make comment like that.

  4. Good Morning Keera xo nd DCR x

  5. Omg mr / mrs anon has struck again !! Well said Steve They obviously don't live in the real world. About time the government gave grandparents raising grand kids some help . Enjoy your weekend Chris....luvin the pics and the quilt :)

  6. Gees, I am speechless at how nasty some people (yes, you "Anonymous") can be. I fully support the comments made by both you and Steve. And to "Anonymous" - if you can't say something nice, don't say it at all. It makes you look bad (I'm being polite when I say that - I'm actually thinking worse) - not Chris Stew or their family. I think that Brylee and Griffith are very lucky to have such caring parents/grandparents who show them so much love.

    Have a good day Chris ... your new work area looks great, and I love the photos - very cute!

  7. My dear Miss Chris, you responded with so much grace that I'm very proud of you. AND Steve, too. I hardly think I would respond so well if someone were being that mean to me. Obviously "anonymous" does not have adult children or understand this concept that while we CAN mess our kids up with overall bad parenting, there are actually very few people out there who are bad parents. Most of us are good parents who struggle, make mistakes, and do great things ALL IN THE SAME DAY. :)

    I know great things are in store for Steve because he has such a gentlemanly style to him, he really does. God bless him.

    I love how anonymouses (mices?) like to pick you apart, imply you're a low class doggie breeder, bad mum, big overspender, my gracious. You can't even go to the thrift shop and spend $20 without someone howling. It's hilariously sad, is what it is. I hope you don't let these people prevent you from blogging what is on your heart, because I know I'm not alone when I say I genuinely love your blog, and I value our friendship and wish you all the best.

  8. Lorraine H9:45 AM

    Chris.I am so sorry you have had to suffer that verbal abuse again from Mr/Mrs Anon again.I wish there were more families like yours that would do the wonderful job you and Stew are doing in raising those two beautiful grandchildren.
    I could not agree more with what Steve said well done.

    Southgirl xx

  9. Well said, Steve!

  10. Anonymous10:09 AM

    Love the pics of the kids with their bottles So cute. Not wasting my time on the anon people. Keep up the good work Lacy you are doing a great job with Keera.

    1. Thank you, I do appreciate your praise :)

    2. Anonymous10:54 PM

      No worries you deserve it

  11. Anonymous10:28 AM

    Chris I really feel so bad for you. I am new to blog world, but isn't there some sort of tracking device you can go to, to locate this anon person? Like an i.d. address or something? Which country they live? These people have no right to express an opinion, especially if you did't ask for one. It's a disgrace!!

    Also thx for the you tube vid on qayg. I will give it a go. Will you be using that same method for your quilt borders? I would love to know your measurements for your sashing with seam allowance. And how you quilted the sashing....if you get my meaning!!

    Cheers and chin up...anon is not worth it.

    Cheryl, uk

    Anyone interested in where their tax money goes should have a look at this site.
    The highest 'bill' for our country is National Superannuation which is not means/asset tested.

    By raising your grandchildren you have saved NZ thousands of dollars, and given Brylee & Griffith the best possible start to life. Lacey has got her life together and is an amazing mother to Keera.

    Your commenter is so vile. Have they never had any hard knocks to deal with in their lives? You and your whole family support and look after each other and have not just given two children away to the state to care for them. Any money you receive now is not a handout. Most Families receive money from the govt, but if you go and have a look at the website above you will see in the overall scheme of things it is a drop in the ocean.

  13. Anonymous11:00 AM

    I love how you both replied to that ass of a comment.

  14. I just love the piccies of Keera and Dante ... they are SO adorable. It's wonderful that they're able to grow up so close :).
    As for "Anonymous" .... how bloody dare they!!!!!!! You and Steve handled it beautifully.
    Hugs xx

  15. You and Steve responded with dignity and grace. Good for you.

    The kids are so cute side by side. So very sweet. Have a great weekend!

  16. Chris and Steve. Well said. I wanted to hit a like button at every sentence. Keep holding your head high grandma !!!

  17. Hey Chris. Don't these anonymous do-gooders make it interesting? Typing some rubbish then sitting back waiting to see what the reaction is. I wouldn't have even acknowledged them. Don't give them what they are looking for. My parents are in a similar situation. They had my sister, who is on a disability pension, and her two disabled kids living with them for years, and they were receiving a tiny bit of help from the government. Now, the sister has a house with the kids, and mum and dad still go in almost every day to lend a hand. But because she no longer lives with them, they cut mum's carer's pension. So now it costs more, but they get less. They are only on aged pensions themselves. So any bit of help the government can give to anyone who is doing another a service, I reckon is well earned. Good on you, and hold your head high woman! x

  18. Good response to Anon's stupid comment. I can't even be arsed wasting any more time on her stupidity to formulate a response.

    Glad the supermarket shop was not too bad, I find the earlier you go the less stupid people are.

  19. Oh dear.. well said Steve. My mother also took on two children in exactly the same situation (now my adoptive brother and sister). She was never paid a cent for this and I believe saved the tax payer much money. There are many grandparents out there who take on children (for many reasons) and while they do it for love, it was never their intention to have to do this so compensation of any kind is most welcome.

  20. Chris thanks for posting the comment and Steve reply. This person sits on there high horse needs a smack in the face. Obviously havnt read your blog for long to c what you do for all your children love costs nothing I agree but it costs a fortune to feed and clothe those you love not to even start on educate. Steve you tell'em boy.
    On a more pleasant not the pics of Dante and Keira absolutely beautiful. Made this sop cry xxxx

  21. Anonymous2:24 PM

    Beautiful photos Chris, well said Steve. Your mum and dad are awesome.

  22. Unbelievable! Some people! I probably would have just deleted their comment. Don't waste your precious time with idiots writing crap!

  23. When I first heard the announcement of the grants, I thought of you and how wonderful it was that at least the payment may ease the financial burdon for you. A lot of people must be in your situation. I work at a high decile college, but believe me you should see what some ( very well to do people) can "con" out of the Ministry of Social Development to pay for. Dont feel for one minute that you dont deserve some compensation for what you have done/ are doing.Chin up, you are not defined by anon comments, rather than by the goodness in you!

  24. Anonymous3:16 PM

    What anon. has also not thought about is the lives B & G will live and their ongoing cost to the government. Because they have been bought up in a loving, stable and caring environment they are more than likely going to live happy and stable lives as adults and go on to be good citizens who contribute positively to the community. They are most likely going to be contributing to the community themselves as adults paying their taxes. If anon had given any thought to what B & G would have had to deal with going from foster home to foster home their futures would have been a lot less stable due to the unstable upbringing and the consequences of this upbringing would more than likely cost the government HUGE amounts all through their adult lives. We have too many kids in our country who have to put up with unloving families. B & G are incredibly lucky kids and the least the government could do is give a wee helping hand with school fees which are much needed VOLUNTARY payments parents make to schools to help fund education. I suspect anon. has given no thought to the bigger picture.

    wwangel (sorry I haven't commented for ages but as you can see anon. needed some enlightenment on the bigger picture).

  25. Anonymous3:57 PM

    Chris, Its a credit to yourself and Stew, over the years i have read your blog you can see clearly both children are loved and the don't want for anything. You and Stew are right up there with their education communicating always with their schools. Unfortunately there are people out there that abuse the system and as we all know. Dont let anyone for one minute make you feel that you are doing anything wrong shame there isn't more people like you both . Wonderful parents wonderful; grandparents :)
    Robyn from Australia

  26. Anonymous7:33 PM

    My comments aren't going through but I'll try again kayjay

  27. It takes on average $10,000 a year to raise a child that's covering everything you have 2 extras that's a lot to bear emotionally and financially, send the government an account for the shortfall....... incl doctors orthodontists shoes clothing food power school costs camps etc the $ figure would make you faint!. caus sure as shit they OWE you!!

  28. Anonymous7:38 AM

    The only reason I comment as "anonymous" is because you don't know me and never will, so using my name has no meaning. If it's that important to you, my name is Cathy Anderson and I live in New York. And I stand by what I said. I don't believe families should make other people, strangers to them, pay to support their own family members. I've been a taxpayer my entire life, but I would NEVER take money from the government, which is actually money coming from all the other taxpayers, to support my own grandchildren. Your comment on your blog about the government giving you money to raise your grandchildren is an insult to every person who reads your blog who is supporting their own family members without asking for handouts.

  29. That's my way of thinking of things. If I get a bit back from all we pay in taxes every so often when we need it it just shows that the system is working for what it is intended.

  30. Great responses! Chris, you are a Grand-mother, in every sense of the word!


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